Gasp......

So... let me start by saying that Sunrise Service in Iowa, is NOTHING like the Sunrise service we got to experience in Florida last year.  Absolutely beautiful! 

However, God has a way of making things beautiful wherever you are.  This morning as I headed out the door alone to our sunrise service (happily night I add - 1 hour on Easter morning to just relish in God's love all alone!)  I was a bit sad that I wasn't on the beach in Florida. 

I glanced at my blackberry and quickly read an e-mail that had me weeping before I even got to church.  As we were singing the opening songs, this feeling came over me.  God was speaking, and I just stood there taking it in.  Words can't really articulate it, but let me try!  (Roll eyes here!) 

Gasp....  It was like I was in the throne room and it was silent.  Complete silence, and the angels... just... gasped.... 

And God spoke to my inner being.  You on earth are rejoicing and singing songs, but the angels gasp.... 

That might not sound like much to many of you, but I was wiping away the tears (the little girls in front of me kept turning around looking at me worshipping to songs and crying.... yeah I was that lady!) 

Then, as Pastor Rick preached out of John 20, it happened again.  That sudden realization that God was moving me.  Rick was talking about how James and peter went to the tomb and then left, and Mary Magdalene was there weeping when the angels appeared to her and then Jesus appeared. 

God clearly spoke to my soul...  "Jen, they were with me.  They sat at my feet and were my closest friends.  I told them what was going to happen, and even as it was happening, they didn't understand.  Don't get frustrated when people don't understand now."

OH GLORIOUS DAY!  You see, I've been needing a bit of my God.  Some whispers were much necessary.  So many things on my heart, so many things I want to shout from the mountain tops.  The e-mail that had me in tears on the way was resolved with God's whispers. 

I came home filled with joy.  Yes, I'm elated that we get to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus and the defeat of Satan today.  However, more than that, he woke me this morning to a reminder that I SERVE A LIVING SAVIOR, he's in the world today, he walks with me and talks with me along life's narrow way. 

It's my prayer that I can find the narrow way.  That I not get caught up in the world, but that I seek His will and purpose, and that I listen.  Soon we'll be talking about him leaving so that he can leave behind one even great than him (the Holy Spirit).  WOW - Easter isn't the end of Holy Week..... it's the beginning of much more profound, celebratory stuff... 

Thank you Lord, for your moving in me today.  You move and I want more, you speak and I want more, more of your spirit....  Release the fullness of your spirit - Shekina Glory Come!  (if you don't recognize it, it's the lyrics one of my favorites!)  If I can figure it out, I'll play it on my site with this post... No promises though! 

Obedience and Preparation

Obedience and Preparation... sound like big words don't they!  Today was a day that I got to experience both of them. 

I was driving to LeMars for a meeting today.  While I was on the road, I was praying for my friends Niki and Deanne who are preparing for a mission trip to India.  Then...  I felt God nudging me to go to Goodwill before my meeting.  (For those of you that know me, I was on Jen time, so I didn't exactly have time for this, but....)  I just had this sense that there would be 2 identical containers/oil pots there.  At this point, it wasn't really an option to not go, so I did.  I also had in the back of my mind that I'd look at this dresser that I had seen there last week too...  Well....  the dresser was sold, but as I walked up and down the aisles, there they were - two dark brown awesome looking little jars/pots that were like minature oil pots.  Perfect.  (Like I had to doubt!) 

I grabbed them and headed up to the check out.  And... sitting right there was some old silverware.  (something that I had been on the lookout for - Smile:-)  It was a double portion of blessing.  Had I not listened to his nudging, I would have missed out... how often do I do that in a days time??? 

Of course, I couldn't wait to give my dear friends their new "jars".  At harp and bowl tonight, I delivered.  As I was sitting there and soaking and praying, God opened my eyes to some of the significance of the Widows Oil.  God totally conviced me of all of our needs for preparation.  How for the widow with the jars, he provided all that she needed.  BUT... she had the faith to trust in that.  and she had enough to keep pouring out and not run dry.  This is a season of preparation.

For Niki and Deanne, it is for a journey to India.  A journey that I feel god is calling them to "be prepared" for.  To be undone by him NOW, before they leave.  To be so filled with him before they go that they can't help but pour it out onto those they are ministering to.  Like God is saying, don't just wait for something amazing to happen in India, Get so close to me here that your jars are all full and overlowing.  Then when you go, you'll know that I am providing for you.. again, and again and again... Wow... 

And then their are the virgins with the lamps of oil...  Some went into the wedding feast with their bride groom... And some hadn't prepared and were gone looking for oil.  Different story, same application... Preparation.... 

At this point I was feeling great about being in His presence and feeling him speak to me.  And then... (yep - there's more)  He very clearly convicts me and says - "this isn't just for NIki and Deanne.... this is for you too.  What are you doing to prepare Jen.  Is your heart so overflowing with me that you don't know where you end and I begin?  Are you looking to be undone by me?  Ori s it more about "head" knowledge - knowing more, learning more, etc.  I just want you.... 

So... while I'm not going to give up on reading my bible or learning more about God.... I am going to get to him more. 

Know more about Him, or know HIm - I chose to know Him.  Spend time learning about God, or spend time with Him???  I chose time with Him... 

Tonight my prayer is one of preparation.  God, I want to be undone by you.  I want to feel that closeness with you!  I want my heart full of you, not just my head.  I don' want to drift, I want to experience a new level of you each day...  Prepare me Lord... for whatever you have in store for me. 

And his final words for me tonight... 

Lots of people can teach about God - I want you to help them know me.... 

The power of a Valentine

So, this post has been tumbling around in my head for a while, and this is the first time I've had a chance to sit and write...  

I recently was blessed to have the opportunity to lead a young man to Jesus.  All because of a valentine.  Seriously.... 

We were helping at the recent Community Unity meal, and Emma helped hand out left over valentine's that the kids at the Sioux Center Christian School had made.  One of these landed in the hands of a sweet boy who was 12 or so. 

After nearly everyone was gone, he had the courage to ask if we had any more Valentines.  My friend Jean promptly responded to his request.  She found one that had a bible verse on it and opened it for him to see.  In lieu of the long story, let's just say that he was needing him some Jesus in his heart:-) 


As we prayed the salvation prayer with him, I kept thinking... wow, little did those kids at that school know that their valentines would be the opening for this boy to ask Jesus into his heart. 

You see, each of us is a valentine.  We just make it seem complicated, when it's really not about us at all.  If we just listen and do whatever it is that God asks us to do with child like faith, he will use it for his glory.  A simple act, a small act, something that seems somewhat insignificant to us, can be the thing that makes a huge impact on someone else. 

I know I find myself thinking that I have to do "big" things.  That I have seek out people and talk to them about Jesus and that I have to have the right words.  This Valentine was a new awakening to me.  It was as if God was saying... "Hey Jen, it's nothing to do with you... I can use ANYTHING to get this person.  You are just one small valentine that I created and am asking to help in the process." 

I may have had the opportunity to "say the prayer" with this young man, but that was such a small part of his journey to that point.  I wish that I knew which child drew his Valentine and could call the school and say "please tell so and so that their valentine was the one that was convincing enough to soften this boys heart."  But that's not how God works.  It wasn't anyone, it was everyone, and no one.  God softened his heart, but he used several people along the way.  The Healthy Families advocate that encouraged this family to come, the Zestos people that were their with food to send home with them, my friend Jean who talked one on one with him, his friends at school who had talked about God, the First CRC group that served him lovingly that night, the people in the prayer closet that prayed during the evening, etc., etc., etc.  You see the list could go on and on and on.  We never know how our walking in obedience to God will change the lives of those around us. 

So, what's going through my head repeatedly about this.  Honestly, I keep thinking - it was jsut one valentine handed out by a 4 year old girl a month late.  And yet... it made a difference in the heavenlies that night.  Wow...  I mean really, think about the angels rejoicing.  Wow... 

When we started Community Unity, in the back of my mind I always thought - wouldn't it be great if someone would give their life to Christ here at some point, and how do we create an environment that would enable that to happen.  8 months later, what I thought was a far off dream became a reality.  Funny thing is, I don't think that we had anything to do with creating that environment.  I think God orchestrated it so perfectly and others were just obedient in their role. 

I'm asking that you join me in praying for this boy.  Life is hard and unfair, and I so want him to just be able to feel and rejoice in the joy of Jesus.  As he processes for a while, please join me in praying that he will experience God in a mighty way.  That he wouldn't doubt what happened but that he would rejoice in it, and feel "different" in a good kind of way.  Pray that the troubles of his young world would not drawn him away from the Lord, but that they would pull him closer to God. 

On another note, my birthday is on valentine's day.  I'm accustomed to valentines, and have always loved them.  However, from now on, I don't know that I'll be able to look at a valentine and not pray and remember this dear child of Christ.  What a sweet gift that the Lord gives me.  That each year, I could remember and rejoice for just this one!  Thank you God for your love!