He Knows My Name... Full Circle

Full Circle...He does that you know... He has this way of doing things and bringing them back full circle.  This blog was birthed out of God moving in my life and leading me to one of the sweetest treats... Read all about it here...


http://www.simplygracejen.blogspot.com/2009/08/nevertheless-gods-solid-foundation.html#links


Mary Banks...  is now a friend on facebook and we casually chat.  She hasn't become my greatest confidant...  But... she is a constant reminder that "God Knows My  Name."  Each time she posts and I get an update on her page, I can't help but smile.  All the more lately.

2011 was a hard year for me, I'm not going to lie.  But in that.  In my deepest times, when Satan was speaking lies to me...  The God of the Universe knew my name.  I won't say that I haven't cried tears often, but I will say that he carried me and blessed me.  Yes... blessed me. 

You see...  he cares about my circumstances.  And he took the time to show me that in a way I can't even begin to explain.  In doing so, he also shared a bit of his heart for the victims of human traffficking. 

Many of you know I help lead the Compel Women's Conference (www.compelconference.org)  Well after last January's conference we met and laid out our theme for this year.  You guessed it... HE KNOWS MY NAME.  We had already lined up 2 fantastic speakers to speak on abandonment, human trafficking and most importantly RESTORATION....  At that point, I didn't know that my family would be in need of some of that very restoration in such a major way. 

As we walked through 2011, he led us on a journey like none before.  To see his had so clearly upon things and using them for his good, even though they seemed devestating was an assurance to me that HE knows each of our names and that is just the begining of what he knows about us....

I have been able to walk alongside a client who was held captive in so many ways....  many of which I would label trafficking.  I've walked through tough stuff with Emma, I've been able to attend conferences that speak to the issue of trafficking and make connections.  And I begin a season of preparation. 

We are just a couple weeks out from the conference now, and I'm reflecting.  You see, in 2009 when I met Mary Banks and in 2005-2006 when I first say her article in that magazine and checked her out...  Even then, God was preparing me and working through his plan.  WHAT IF... I hadn't listened.  What if I never checked her out, or e-mailed her in boldness to see how I could pray for her.  What if I hadn't been bold enough to speak to her at the conference and see if she remembered me?  God would still have moved, but I'd have missed out on so much blessing of know him more.  You see, it's not about Mary Banks.... it's about God speaking to me and loving me.  He wants that with each of us...

One of the songs on my blog is "I want to be in Eden."  It's a reminder to me that God brings things full circle and that we will be in an eternal "Eden" because of what he has done for us.  And we read in Revelation that he has a new name for us that only he knows... written on a white stone.  That gives us an entirely new way of thinking of "He Knows My Name."  Ponder that for a while... 


Thank you Jesus. Thank you for how you orchestrate things that we can't even imagine. How if we wait patiently for you, you bring things full circle. God I'm sorry for the plans that you had for me that I missed because I wasn't listening.   And Jesus, I can't wait for heaven, for "eden".  I can't wait to see the name you have written for me.  Use me as a blessing during my earthly time...

25 Days of Christmas

So... this post is a few days over due... my apologies!

Each year for Christmas our family does something for someone else as Tom's Christmas gift.  My husband is an amazing man, and he decided quite some time ago that he didn't want any "thing" for Christmas.  I can still remember the first time that Kendra, Matt and I did this.  We adopted a family through ATLAS and dropped off a bunch of gifts at our church for them to pick up.  I also remember the tears in their daddy's eyes when he read the note that we gave him as his gift.  You know it is a great gift when it makes a grown man cry! 

Anyway... every year it is a challenge to find something that I think will be special to him.  I've been praying about this... and then it came to me.  Our kids have been loving the 25 days of Christmas commercial on ABC.  (Also their every night Christmas shows have found us in front of our tv as a family (minus the big kids:-(ALOT more than usual!)  Here's a link to the song.  It's not uncommon to hear one of the little Sandbulte's running around the house singing this tune... 

http://abcfamily.go.com/specials/25-days-christmas/videos-details/promos/the-band-perry/pl_PL5564978/vd_VD55153398

As Emma was singing it the other day, it came to me.  25 days of Christmas.  25 days of giving of ourselves.  Each day Tom tells the little kids to be Jesus and make a difference in someone's life today.  When I drop them at school, that's the final parting...

So what does 25 days of Christams look like as a gift?  Well... that's where you all come in.  I'm challenging our kids (big and little) to do something that makes a difference in someone's life each day until Christmas and to record it.  I'd LOVE for you to join us.  Maybe challenge your family as well.  And I'll be posting here each day and on facebook.  Join in and share your comments.  And then, when we celebrate the arrival of Jesus as a baby on Earth to reign as our Savior, we will have a heart that is operating in loving our neighbors. 

Please keep in mind it doesn't have to cost money, or be a "thing".  It's really just about looking around us with different eyes and doing things for others. 

So...

Day 1 - Dec. 1 - Thursday night is Harp & Bowl night.  I had the privelage of leading prayer.  As I closed, I felt the Lord speaking a verse to me about the hem of his robe.  I prayed into that at the closing not knowing what it was really about.  My friend Wendy was there and I hadn't connected with her since before Thanksgiving.  Wendy is going to India for Christmas to minister to disabled Orphans.  Instead of being with her family.  WOW huh???  Well... As we hugged and chatted briefly she shared that verse had spoke a great deal to her.  Where was it from...  Believe it or not... I had forgotten by then - Isaiah 5 I think.  When I went back to my seat I looked it up.  Isaiah 6.  nuts... so back to her I went to share the right reference.  It was really a little thing.  REALLY.  But as I think of Thursday and what was a blessing to someone else, that is definately what comes to mind.   

Day 2 - Dec. 2 - I was with a couple of friends and we went to DesMoines to meet with our COMPEL Conference (www.compelconference.blogspot.com) speaker.  I bought lunch... (OK that isn't it the part I'm talking about!)  2 of the ladies insisted on paying me for their part.  I had fully intended to buy lunch as I had called the meeting.  So.. I told them if they wanted to leave the money it would turn into a tip for the waiter.  (Who by the way was very gracious in letting us sit at his table for 3 hours in Jordan Creek Mall at the Cheesecake Factory during a Friday Christmas lunch rush!)  We left before he saw it... but I'm sure this young man was pleased with his tip that was nearly $30 (I'm guessing - I didn't even count it. 

Was it tempting to pick it up and think... he doesnt need THAT big of a tip....  sure.  But really???  My intentions were the same the entire time.... to buy lunch.  If they chose to contribute (or insisted) then why would I not leave it for him...

Dec 3 - We had our first snow of the season today.  (And a swim meet an hour away)  Emma stayed at my moms house and had a hay day!  After I had gotten home on slick roads, it was nearly dark and the boys were coming in from playing in the snow with a friend.  Little Emma cried and cried because she had been begging to do a snow angel when she got home.  Try as I might, I couldn't convince her brothers to go out with her.  SO... on went the snow gear, and MOMMY went out with her and did the snow angel (OK - reality time - mommy was not so happy about all this at this point! But I couldn't bear to see her so sad!)  A snow angel turned into a snowball fight and the neigbors coming to play.  Before I knew it the neighbor kids were over.  And on a glistening winter night our neighborhood came alive with laughter and memories. 


So you see... they are little things.  But things that make a difference.  In total.. I've spent - oh yeah... $0.  No black Friday sale, no standing in line, and no bills to pay after Christmas.... 

Ok - today is a new day... Can't wait to begin this journey with all of you.   Praying blessings over you as you become a blessing to someone else. 

What does God think about me?

Today as I was getting ready for our Simple Talk Bible Study at noon, I reread chapter 5 of Renee Swope's Confident Heart. 

And what jumped out at me is something that I am still processing.  I don't have my book here, so I'm going to paraphrase

How often do we, throughout the day, worry what someone else will think of us?  Either consciously or subconsciously?  Who are we really trying to please.  Usually it is someone else... Our boss, our spouse, or friends, etc. The list goes on and on.  We may shift throughout the day of who we are trying to please and who we are worried about thinking less of us. 

But in reality, how often do we first think "what does God think of me"  For many of us, that seems almost scary to say.  But really, shouldn't we be living our life every minute of every day asking that question.  Who are we really living for?  What are we living for?  Many of us would answer that question with God.  But do our actions reflect that? 

When I get dressed each morning, and think about my day, Am I REALLY getting dressed to impress God? 

When I get upset with Emma cuz she won't let me fix her hair.... is that for God?  or to impress someone else? 

When I change twice for church cuz I can't decide what to wear....  (ok - or maybe what fits, but still...) is that for God? 

When I read facebook instead of my bible... Is that for God? 

When I buy Christmas presents, but then hesitate to give someone money to go to Haiti... Is that for God? 

I think you see where I'm going with all this.  Even in our best intentions, we are missing God in so many ways.  Don't ask me why, but this was VERY convicting to me today.  I want to go deeper with the Lord, and yet so many of my day to day decisions are shallow and for the wrong reasons. 

I don't want to be lukewarm... I want to be hot.  I want my first thought and my last thought of the day to be honoring to God.  I want more of him and less of me. 

Lord I thank you for humbling me in new ways today.  For helping me to see how afraid I am of being sold out fo ryou and not pleasing man.  Guide me God.  Give me eyes to see what you see when you look at me!